Month: April 2003

The Old Couple.

The old man lifts a wrinkled hand and strokes the old women’s gray hair. The old women lifts a wrinkled hand puts it on his left knee, to comfort him. Together they are one, one entity in which all has started. For together, they created all of which exists, they are the creator.

They longed for a relationship. Soon, they created the universe together. Both the old man and women created the universe, stretching them in such a way they would continue for ever, and ever. In this wonderful universe they created a special place, just for this relationship they longed for.

This place would be the planet Earth; on Earth the first creation in which they could have a relationship with was created. In their own image they created Adam, a human, something which could love, or hate them back. Adam was able to communicate with the old entity one on one. The creator asked Adam to name all the animals and have dominion over them, it was a beautiful site, and the old couple was very happy and pleased with their creation.

Soon after though, the creator decided it was not good for Adam to be alone. The old couple wanted Adam to have the same relationship they did. So, from Adam they created Eve. Eve was created in the same image as Adam. Eve was a helper to Adam as the creator was a helper to the two of them. Together they were also joined as one, having the same attributes as the old couple, for alone they could not accomplish this.

The old couple loved Adam and Eve with all their hearts. They called Adam and Eve their young creation, for they were joined together as one, just as the old couple. They instructed the earthly couple to use what they had given them. They also told them about the choices they could make, to live holy lives which would honor their creator, who longed for a loving relationship. The other choice was to know both good and evil. The creator did not want the creation to know this, because it would mean the relationship would be broken, and their creation would need to be taught the hard way, but because of their love, they gave this choice to the young creation.

The evil in the world, was about one day, and talked Eve into making this choice to know both good and evil. Eve was convinced and chose to know both good and evil. Adam did not stop Eve from making this choice, and so in essence Adam too made the choice, because they are one.

From here on, there was a separation between the creator and the created. But the creator moves on, and has a plan which is good, and would restore the relationship. The creator had many people do many things, so that one day; they (the creator) could finally repair this relationship, which is all they wanted.

So in time, they came down to Earth, in the human version of them self to repair the relationship. Because the Earthly culture had been so separated they had forgotten that both male and female were created in the image of the creator, neither male nor female is greater than the other, but the culture deemed men stronger, and wiser. Therefore the creator had to send a son, to repair the relationship, and make it sacred once again.

This son of theirs would live a life as the creator had commanded from the beginning. He would fulfill all the predictions of generations past. He would remain a mystery for years and years to come, because only he would truly repair the relationship with the creator for humanity’s sake.

The son was so radical, he claimed to be the son of the creator, to be the only way to be with the creator forever, he told the creation their was one narrow path, but the creation revolted against him, and killed him. But just as was predicted he rose from the dead; and with him brought the spirit of the creator to all who followed him, and to all who change their ways from that day forward. The relationship from that day can always be restored, just by accepting that the son died to recreate the original relationship and following the ways of the son of the old couple, of the creator.

The old couple now watch, cry, laugh, love, play, sing, listen, give, and take of their creation. They long for relationship with every single one of their creation, in such a way that they can personally guide and direct them, so that in the end of their Earthly lives they may never be separated again.

Fellowship was the name of the game today. I love being around people, I love talking, hanging out, and just being real with a group of people who share the same common drive, Jesus. I love hanging out why my other “non-Jesus” friends, but they just don’t give me the same high as these guys. I love just feeling uplifted and loved. We don’t always agree on things, but we know how to communicate and show that even in the end, we still love each other. I’ve realized that to have fun, you just got to be your self, instead of trying to get attention or expecting people to talk to you, just talk to them, and be your self, ask questions. Lets just say today was very filling, even though I didn’t accomplish much, I did improve on relationships, and that my friends the most important thing in life. So a quick run down of my weekend….

Friday night – Jordan Munoz @ Lauren’s AWESOME – Visit his website, awesome music! After that, at about 1am I decided to go catch up with Kyle, Ryan, Eric, Andy and Brandy. Where we watched Evolution (yeah, don’t ask) and Down Periscope… funnnnyyy.

Saturday Night – Slept in until noon, then Katy came over and we talked it was fun. Then we went to Pet Smart so I could buy some new fishies, then on our way back to my place, I got rear ended right across from the entrance to my place… but its okay, now all the damage on my bumper will be fixed (at no cost to me) because in Washington state all rear endings are by default the other person’s fault (whoever is in back). Put the fishies in my tank, then went off to John’s place for a Guy’s night, where John, Joel and I went to Billy McHale’s and had our selves some ribs, potatoes and other good stuff. Then we played games back at John’s place… fun stuff.

Sunday – Got up at 10am, went to Church (Bob was awesome, and sooo funny today) learned about the narrow path, about how narrow the Christian path really is. Then a bunch of us from the Young Adults group hung out the rest of the day. We first went to the Old Spaghetti Factory, then we went to Funtasia where we played mini-golf, then we went to the Edmunds waterfront, and talked and screwed around. Then we went to Tully’s in Edmunds where we were going to get something to eat and drink, but we didn’t instead a group of us waited in line for the bathroom for like 20 min, then they told us there was a bigger bathroom down the hall where we could actually relieve ourselves quickly. After that, we went to Brandy’s place, it was fun, we had pizza and played video games and talked and stuff, fun times. Then I went home, and found the desk in the corner of my room had been knocked over by, what else but the cats. All off my stuff was all over my floor, including my laptop, of which the wireless card was busted, thank God I had another one, and it’s working right now. Then Eric came home with Leah and we went to the hot tub, when we returned there were two people waiting at the top of the opposite stairs and they served Eric with papers from some lady who wants to sue him for some accident 3 years ago… whatever. Anyway now I’m here typing this… yay… God is good. I promise to have blog entries a little more deep than this, but this is what I’ve been feeling like doing so, this is what you’re getting.

PS. I’ve decided to use names now, but only in good context. Which means I have to use my judgement, so if I use a name in bad context please let me know i’ve misjudged, and i’ll remove the name/content/post. Thanks.

I love the sun; it just makes me feel better. One of the nicest feelings is when it is a sunny Friday, you know what I mean? You get off work (for me that means finally leaving my office which has no windows), go outside the warmth of the sun hits my body, and I get giddy because I don?t have to work or go to school for two days! It means good times with friends, going out, and best of all worship and Bob on Sunday morning! I am always so ready for church on Sundays; I don?t know how I survived with out it before.

So last night I found that boy who was missing. I found him in the middle of worship at Young Adults last night, it was awesome. You know how I found him? I just released it all, I released all the crap in my life, and I gave it to God to handle. But instead of half heartedly saying “God, take all of this and do as you please” I put the expectation on God to handle it, I essentially screamed at him, it felt so good! And you know what? He took it, he took it all away, and I felt physically close to him more than I have in a while. This whole week has been exhausting but I know I can expect God to take care of those things. God is good.

Here are a few things I have learned in my short years of being with Christ.

1) I can truly expect God to do things, this isn?t being blind this is having faith.

2) Using both my emotions, my mind, and my initial instinct to follow Christ works the best. Essentially loving God with my Heart, Mind and Soul? and worshipping God with truth (mind) and Spirit (soul and emotions).

3) Thinking of others and how you can positively affect them, instead of your self is positively the most rewarding thing I can ever do. This is by far the best thing we can do on Earth as Christians for other people.

Still searching for that boy who had the faith to move a mountain.

Want the fire back.

Another question in me

One for the powers that be

It’s got me thrown and so

I put on my poker face

And try to figure it out

This undeniable doubt

A common occurrence

Feeling so out of place

Guarded and cynical now

Can’t help but wondering how

My heart evolved into a

Rock beating inside of me

So I reel, such a stoic ordeal

Where’s that feeling that I don’t feel?

There was a boy who had the faith to move a mountain

And like a child he would believe without a reason

Without a trace he disappeared into the void and

I’ve been searching for that missing person

Under a lavender moon

So many thoughts consume me

Who dimmed the glowing light

That once burned so bright in me

Is this a radical phase

A problematical age

That keeps me running

From all that I used to be

Is there a way to return

Is there a way to unlearn

That carnal knowledge

That’s chipping away at my soul

I’ve been gone too long

Will I ever find my way home?

There was a boy who had the faith to move a mountain

And like a child he would believe without a reason

Without a trace he disappeared into the void and

I’ve been searching for that missing person

He used to want to try to walk the straight and narrow

He had a fire and he could feel it in the marrow

It’s been a long time and I haven’t seen him lately but

I’ve been searching for that missing person

//Michael W. Smith//

I thought this song was by someone else, but I guess not, I guess Michael W. Smith isn’t that bad after all. Any way, this song sums up how i’ve been feeling lately.

So, I just havn’t had much to say lately. I have a lot of things going on upstairs… but they are not very well put together at the moment. Just pray that I can grow stronger, i’m having some relapses in certain areas (that’s enough for most people to understand).

Here is what is in my head right now.

1. I really do not like my job right now.

2. We really need a roommate, and hopefully someone I know will want to move in.

3. School work is insane at the moment, but I love it at the same time.

4. I really need to catch up on my support letters and all that good stuff for my missions to Poland.

5. When you actually go to work on time, it’s a long, long time before that awesome lunch time comes up.

6. God is awesome, and i’m going to go to Bible College when I return from Poland.

So, I was sitting at Starbuck’s tonight with a good friend of mine, when I had this thought. Why is God sending me somewhere when I have no real experience? Why am I feeling called to some kind of pastorship, when I have no real skill in it? Why do I have god given skills in something my heart is not in? Why do I have no heart in the skills God has given me and why is my heart in something I have no skills?

Her answer? Because God calls us to depend on him, when we lean on our skills we don’t need him, but if we do something he is calling us to do, we have to lean on him, so he can use us. Wow, what a thought. Now?

God, can I please have at least a little heart put back into my gifts which you have given me? Can you please just change up my work somehow? I know? I need to have a change of heart, I need to initiate it? I’m just too lazy right now, and for how long; I have no idea. I need to really sit down and pray and figure this out, I know if this whole work thing gets panned out, then I can really start to enjoy my gifts.

P.S.

Check out this article, I agree with it 100%. I might have more to say about it later, but it pretty much sums up how I feel about that subject, and if you read it closely, well then you should understand.

Click to enlarge.

Yes, we still fall short of being perfect. We can not be perfect only God is perfect. But we must try and live un-questionable lives so that others may notice who we serve. When we do mess up, forgive yourself, ask for forgiveness and change from those ways. I still sin, every single day, now it may not affect others, but it does affect my relationship with God. I can only imagine how much it hurts him to be ignored, for his children to be making decisions which he knows will lead them to bad consequences, but like any other good parent, he lets us learn our lessons. All he cares is that we love him back, and listen and try to follow him, and change of our sinful ways, or be in that constant desire to honor him, as a friend, a parent, as God.

We need to make intentional relationships with people who do not follow Christ. This American society in particular (or at least the Seattle culture) is not open to people randomly coming up to you in a mall, or going door to door, or getting phone calls, or simply being “preached at”. No, this culture is not that easily reached. This culture is selfish, scared, and claims to be “open minded” but we are not. I’m not only talking about the secular people, I’m talking about the Christians too. Have we forgotten what it’s like to be on the outside of the Christian sphere? Have we lost touch with the real world? I think many of us have, including my self sometimes. My suggestion; make relationships with pre-Christians (I say pre-Christians because I know everyone is capable of knowing Christ), don’t do what is not God-honoring, but be there for them, serve them. Our culture is selfish; we must see what is in it for us.

Unless people see what is so amazing, what we claim is so great, why we live, they will never want to know and follow Christ. I speak from experience, I saw a changed life. I saw my best friend from preschool change, she had a new light about her, and she was excited and living for a purpose. I became curious, but I was very cautious, I had heard the horrible things churches can do to people, I didn’t want that to happen to me or to her. So, after nearly 6 or 7 months, I finally went to church with her, it was a little uncomfortable for me, but I stayed, because I had a relationship with her, and I was making new relationships with other people, who truly cared for me and still do to this day.

So, live a life which is unquestionable, you’ll be rewarded not only here on Earth, but by our God, our loving God. Live a life which sparks questions of hope in the people around you; make it your choice to honor God in all you do. By honoring God in everything you do, you not only serve him, and make him smile, you serve other people, and you show God’s love to them. Let the things which bother you, bother you no more, for they are unimportant in the whole scheme of things, look at the big picture, honor God, and you will not need to worry about such things.

You are the light of the world ? like a city on a mountain, glowing in the night for all to see. Don’t hide your light under a basket! Instead, put it on a stand and let it shine for all. In the same way, let your good deeds shine out for all to see, so that everyone will praise your heavenly Father.

[Mathew 5:14-16]

Lord,

You are my God, and the only God I serve, I worship, and praise. Thank you for not expecting me to be perfect. Thank you for always being with me. Thank you for being awesome. I will search for your heart in everything I do. I will sing of your love forever. Let me never lose my love for you, I want to never dishonor you.

I see the people moving all around me, going places, doing things ? But where are they?

The bus is empty, where are the people? New life strolls by ? she looks on curiously as the music fills this lonely corner. They stop, they look, and they go. Where are they going?

An old man walks his dog, who will he come home to? Blue, green, yellow, purple, tan, white, black, red all kinds of colors, we are all so different.

A man walks about this corner, a small boom box, his only companion tonight; I’m too scared to talk to him, who is there for him? Lord be here with all these people ? make me your light, my heart explodes for them, but I’m frozen in fear.

I ask for all of them to know you. Have them seek you, as I want to. Lord I will bang on those doors, so they may know you.

So be it.

Yay, well i’m going to go see Carly play down at the “Starbucks corner” in Woodinville. Come join us if you get the chance…