Well, for the past three months or so I have been drained, tired, unmotivated, and simply depressed. But I truly believe that yesterday was a turning point. Most of the frustration from all of these feelings was being poured upon Alexis. We were both very unhappy with the status of our relationship, both annoyed at each other, but most of all I was doing nothing to improve the situation, except hoping she would just change. I have always said that if I thought about changing her then I knew I was in the wrong place, if not in the wrong relationship. But there I was, doing exactly what I knew was wrong and not wanting to change any of it. Granted there is a lot of stress on our relationship that isn’t “normal”, but if we don’t try and work through it now, what would we do in person?
With the advice of some very awesome mentors in my life and the guiding of the Holy Spirit we finally talked and looked at the issues at face value. For the first hour I was ready to just break it up right there. However, we started to talk about “us” all the feelings, when the first time we felt those feelings (in our life, not in our relationship and for both of us it was related to certain people in our lives who made us react to certain feelings in a certain way) and we forgave each other for crossing those lines and not dealing with them properly. A huge heavy weight was lifted and both of us have a great outlook on the future now. The advice of the Godly never fails, the truth of the Bible never fails, and our choices to follow this advice and truth is what it all depends on.
I never want to underestimate your powers, yet I do it all the time. The world around me may appear to crumble, but you are always strong. I’ve put my hope in you, not in anything else of this world and now I have seen the power and strength that comes from standing on your teaching. I have overcome so many fears, obstacles, and many impossibilities because of your truth. You have worked in my life in so many ways and I thank you for using people as your hands and feet. Because I give recognition to you as the doer of all things in my life I receive your blessing, if it were me doing or claiming to be doing, then I know I would never see the blessings. I know you Many think you are intangible, I do not I know you use us and that is tangible. Thank you, you are the one who does all good things. Continue to protect, help me to be guided by you and be effective for you. In Jesus’ name – make it so.