Some much needed rest

Well with the imminent inclement weather on its way I’ll be enjoying a nice weekend with zero plans.  This is much needed as I have found myself feeling a bit frazzled and not motivated to spend time with other people.  A nice quiet house sounds nice, but I also want to get some things done and get some shopping finished too.  One day at a time, we just might get marooned at home for all I know!  Blessings, merry Christmas, and happy new year.

We’re officially kicking off our long term fund raisingin January, so that’s one BIG project I’m trying to get together.  We’re aiming for 100 people to give $30.35 per month until we leave (September 2010) or 200 people giving $15.29.  I think it’s very doable!  Start praying and we’ll let you know more after the New Year!

Parasitical Christianity

A couple weeks ago I was watching a DVR recorded episode of Fringe, a newer sci-fi in its first season on Fox, similar to the X-Files but instead of paranormal kind of investigations, it’s fringe science, the study of bio engineering and things like that.  This episode I was watching was about an agent who had a very large parasite (engineered from microscopic size) wrapped around his heart and living off him.  The thing that struck out to me about this parasite was that it had “roots” that went up the blood vessels and into the IV drip.  Essentially this was slowly dehydrating the host body and slowly killing him (which is where my little analogy breaks down, but you’ll get the point).

I think God would love to have us as parasites, to be fully dependent on him, of which we are.  I know that when I try to make it on my own I begin to die – much like a parasite.  I find the following definitions of parasite very much the definition I would like to see my life with God be.

1. an organism that lives on or in an organism of another species, known as the host, from the body of which it obtains nutriment.

2. a person who receives support, advantage, or the like, from another or others without giving any useful or proper return, as one who lives on the hospitality of others.

3. (in ancient Greece) a person who received free meals in return for amusing or impudent conversation, flattering remarks, etc.

Greek: parásītos one who eats at another’s table, feeding beside

God is our host – we are invited to eat at his table w/o any return to him.  Yet out of this abundance comes a heart of generosity and we are compelled to do the same unto others.  So do I live on my own, attempting to live w/o the bloodline I should?  Or do I leech myself onto the Host of hosts and the King of kings?

Murmurs

These feelings, these ideas, these urges drive me mad.  Someone murmurs to me one picture of life, and another murmur paints a radically different landscape.  Both have benefits, both have dire consequences, and inside, my mind fights for both.  My soul craves and desires, my spirit longs for life, and my mind is the battlefield.

From time to time these murmurs are blurred voices from the past, pulling on hooks which are buried in scar tissue and that when pulled bring about only a faint pain – a pain that is nondescript and dull, without a specific story, simply a feeling.

When I follow these whispers I always end up in a black void around me, unable to distinguish my mind, from my spirit, to my soul.  A void where everything, even the great things in life have faint significance and any light that shines has not a place to reflect, it falls flat.

Yet even though this void seems endless, full of pain, gnawing, and miserable endless muted open wounds – a light still pierces the darkness until it is absorbed into my spirit and filled once again.  Beginning as a faint and distant pearl of light, it spirals down, glimmering as sunlight on a diamond.

It is this mystery that is the gift, it is this gift that is increasingly more difficult to receive, over and over, and over again.  Yet it is this gift, this light, that brings a hope and purpose to this world and a life in the next.  For if I ever forget this gift, if I ever stop accepting it then I will have lost the love that is in the light and I will cease to truly live.

Your revolution within me

In the beginning I heard your voice of acceptance and I believed in your grace.  On the mountain you poured your love on me and showed me your ways.  There were plethora points for your hand to heal.  In those first few years you built my faith.

As I went down the mountain I lost sight of your hand.  I kept looking and looking and asking why the darts kept flying my way.  Why were the images of my past driving my days?  Why in spite of my closeness to you I continued to be pulled away.  Around each twist and turn I saw the enemy and with each fight I grew weaker and weaker.  Where does my faith finally win out over the lies?  When will I finally be relieved of the torture?

I stand here and worship you for each day, some full of dark some full of light.  I praise you for the light, and I praise you for the dark, for in the dark I meet your grace.  You pour out gifts, blessings, and opportunity, in spite of my wickedness and my transgressions.

Only because I choose to believe in your love for me, do you choose to pour out more on me, and I turn it back to praise.  Even when I fail to give thank, and fail to honor you, and choose to fall, you still pour out.  I do not deserve, I do not even try, all I do is stand in awe.  May I always tap into your revolution within me.

New job and open doors

About a month ago I began thinking about why I had so much anxiety in regards to work, while I like the job, the tasks, that I do for my current employer, I really did not see any opportunity to move forward, not that I would with just about two years to go before the big move, but there wasn’t even the ability to move laterally and do something different if I felt like it.  Then some decisions and issues with the company began happening, shortly after our return from Kraków in October – and these things just added to the list, all of it in the area of employee-care -basically there was none.

I began praying and asking God for an open door, I didn’t post my resume anywhere, I didn’t knock on every IT firm out there – I simply prayed and God reminded me of one place…

So, I checked out a company that one of my former co-workers (form my current employer) is working for now.  And they had a position listed on their website – so I applied.  I contacted my old co-worker and he gave me a good reference – a few days later I had an interview, then a week later a final interview with the CEO.  On Saturday they gave me an offer, I counter offered (too much of a pay-cut even with the benefits being so much better) they came back with a very reasonable offer.  So starting on December 5th (strange a Friday, but gives me a good full week of real work instead of HR stuff) I will be employed by Smarsh, look at their website to get an idea of what they do.

Finish life update – back to the regularly scheduled program – oh wait – there hasn’t been any.

Dear Church Member,

Shared by TravisM

Amen – Make it so!

Check out the original here: http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/RagamuffinSoul/~3/460026558/

(This is not written to anyone in particular. Rather to every church member of every church out there)

You may like the way your worship leader sings.
You may like the way your worship leader looks.
You may like what your worship leader says.
You may like the songs your worship leader writes.
All that is dandy.
It is great to feel those nice, pretty, shiney things.

But it is not about you.

It is not about your likes, needs, and comfort at all.
The reason they stand before you is to lead you to a place of unabandoned worship in your Savior.
The reason they stand before you is to display to you a lifestyle of worship that God has called you and them into.
The reason they stand before you is to CHALLENGE you that your level of praise to God Almighty should take a step up.
The reason they stand before you is because God Himself, has called them, TO LEAD YOU in worship.
This means that you need leading.
So stop staring at them, and start following them.

Get The Jonas Brothers and Miley Cyrus to lead worship at your church if you’re in it for kicks and giggles.
But if you are in it to be led…
Swallow your pride and follow your leader.
Los
My Thought’s For The Worship Leader…Click Here

Priority creed

Knowing my priorities in life has been the number one prevention of stress in life, that is when I actually stick to my priorities.  My number one priority is my relationship with God – this means I make a point to be disciplined in knowing God and letting God know me.  The second priority is with my wife – when my relationship with God is right it helps me be the Godly husband that flows out of a right relationship with God.  My third priority is to my family as a whole – when Alexis and I are right, our household is right, and together we can minister with compassion, love, and righteousness to others.  From there flows everything else, ministry (missions, young adults, small group, etc), friends, work, etc.

Yet what does a priority look like?  How do I actually live these out as priorities?  The most tangible way for us has been to actually schedule each priority out.  I take my relationship with God and put Him on my calendar first – for me that looks like studying His word (so I put it on my calendar to do this each morning), being on a worship team (this is personally my number one way of connecting intimately with God), and making my daily decisions prayerfully.  Then the rest of our calendar is filled based on our stated priorities, in order, and one does not supercede the other, nor do other random things that seem to fly at us from all corners.

And in other news this is my 1,001st post since November of 2002 – neat!

USING THE "S-WORD" IN CHURCH

Shared by TravisM

Our culture has a lot of issues tied to money – give this article a read and see what creative solutions there may be.

Full article here: http://www.theooze.com/articles/article.cfm?id=2162

Go to church for very long, and you are bound to hear someone utter the ‘s-word’ in church. By that I mean stewardship. We often cringe when the conversation of increasing our giving comes up, especially in challenging economic times. Jesus challenges us to break away from the consumer-driven mentality that so permeates our culture and to embrace the ‘God-reality’ that he describes in the Sermon on the Mount. As we do this we find that our perspective on giving (and on life in general) changes. We put God’s portion aside first, regardless of the economy or other life circumstances.

Another creed series

From time to time I like to write about my “creeds” or personal beliefs if you will, and over the years these beliefs have changed, not dramatically.  I don’t believe they have contradicted themselves, they have simply developed and matured – and probably will continue to do so.  Even if they do contradict themselves, I pray that they continue to be based on my relationship with God and in agreement with the greatest commandments – love him with all of me, and love people with all of me.

So over the next few days I hope to take some time to address specific ideas and beliefs – some of which are of the controversial flavor.  For now take a look at my past creedal statements.