A while back I wrote about how much I loathe the fund raising process, the ups and downs, the stress, and everything else that goes along with something based on faith. Still, I have a philosophy about my Christian walk that I believe is important, and it’s being real. While it may have a whiny tone, it may be jaded at times, I find it freeing to express myself (without slandering, hurting, or otherwise giving bad connotations about others), my doubts, my concerns, my opinions, and in this I find blessing from God. I find that my relationship is something based communication and love, not just “knowledge”, pat answers, and “should haves”.
I believe too that because of this, this creates a relationship with God that I feel is real. I am always aware of his voice, because I’m always telling him things, and hearing back how (at times) rediculous I am in my rantings. Yet, it’s always a fatherly kind of thing (and sometimes motherly, in fact).
So what’s the result of all this? Amazing trust, and a God who never fails to build my faith in Him. Over the past 24 hours we have recieved four donations to our trip (which we leave on Saturday for) totaling, get this, $1,950! I know it’s because I keep putting my faith where it belongs, even though my mind doubts, God knows our weaknesses, and He knows our stregnths, and he works in both! Amen? YES.