A little bit of throw up

Man I’m tired of filtering what I write (actually, most of the time it’s filtered completely out before I even write, hence the sound of crickets around here).  There’s been a lot going on in my life, all of it is “good” – but that’s a very relative term.  My “good” stuff has mostly smelled like vomit though.  Now, I’m sure you’re trying to figure out how good stuff can smell like vomit, trust me, when you walk with God, sometimes good smells like vomit.  You see, it’s taken a lot of bad smelly stuff to realize that I need to work on some (more) things in my life.  I like being stretched, but man, recently this stretching has taken me to a new level of trusting in God.  Okay, so I’ve said a lot without really saying anything.

So the stink that I keep referring to are things where God has shown me where I fail to walk in the person he created me to be.  Places where I still shy away from being the real man of God I need to be.  None of these things are a “should be” they are a “called to be”.  What I mean by all of this; is that when I choose to walk in the picture that God has called me to be, then the stink is much more mild.  But when I just walk around, operating in reaction to people and circumstances, then my stomach starts to get upset and vomit starts spewing onto those around me.  Envisioning myself as the called child of God takes burning the stink out, making mistakes, but most of all love.  Walking in God’s love, with each decision produces a life of hope and makes each day something to enjoy.

I want to write more, I miss it, but for some reason I feel like I need to filter my thoughts.  Here’s to hoping that goes away…