I believe I may have figured something out – this blog is… MY blog, not yours, not “theirs”, not for anyone else… it’s mine… for me. I’ve always struggled with this blog as a silly selfish outlet to get some attention… and we all know we all would like more attention (weather good, bad, or indifferent). I struggle with the very premise of blogging, social networking, etc, because it is all self-centered, and narcissistic.
You see, I have some fears… yeah, really, I do… who would have thought? I fear judgement, misunderstandings, and all kinds of silly things which are just fear-based narcissistic, self-centered reactions. I have always wanted my writing to be something for people to feel encouraged and refreshed after they read, to be words that provoke thought and bring clear thinking.
I think I’ve come to a peace, some understanding between the conflicting values and ideologies in myself. This blog is mine, and it will be about me, but it will be about who I am, why I do what I do, and most of all, it will be food for fish, and encouragement for all.
I think it’ll be more like the beginning…. Except this time, w/o the fear.