January 2008 – Page 2 – No Small Talk

The ups and downs

Ever since New Years Day I have been struggling with a case of the “ups and downs”. I go from feeling discouraged and unmotivated to amazing God-praising spouts of joy. So what’s the root of all this? It’s a number of things, thoguh I think the catalyst was finding out at a company meeting that we would all be getting a 25% pay cut for the next 60 days in order to save our bottom line.

That put me into a world wind of emotions, from fear (of the unknown financial impact) to anger (caused by the fear) towards the management for not being more forward looking. I am thankful that they want to keep our team and not let anyone go, but if after 60 days things don’t look up, they better let go of some folks, or else I’ll be forced to look for a new job, and that is stressful when thinking about having a baby and the insurance ramifications.

I know the next few months won’t be easy, many of the little things we like to do (Starbucks, Grabbing a bite with friends, etc) will need to be cut. However, even with the cuts my projected budget shows a shortfall of just over $1,000 a month… that spells doom and gloom towards my “be the provider” mentality.

However, I have found a new spark in all my worship, a new meaning for “surrender”, and a new love for the song “Blessed be your name” by Matt Redmond.

Surrender

Verb

To give up into the power, control, or possession of another; specifically(Military) to yield (land, a town, etc.) to an enemy.
To give oneself up into the power of another, especially as a prisoner; to submit or give in to.

Last I checked I wasn’t a prisoner of Jesus. Bond-servant yes. But have I given my power, my control, my possessions to Jesus? I have a lot to surrender, from a Lord who does not demand it.

A new read: Holistic Liberal Christian

I found a new blog via “Backyard Missionary“, called “Holistic Liberal Christian” (HLC) whose personality desires to be Speculative, broad-minded, frank, and intellectually independent. Already is on the same page as I, although I appear to be on the “mainstream” much of the time, I’m more and more into the ideals of HLC than the main. However the importance of the fellowship is so key to my (and I believe all others) development as a diciple that I feel I have a mission inside the exsisting structure to at least put windows in, where there are 3 feet thick walls at the moment.

So, take a look, the books, videos, and other resources are great brain food especially considering missions.

My internal conflictions

A quick list of things that I’m struggling to grasp right now in my life and walk with Jesus.

Raising funds without sounding like a broken record/beggar (see previous post, didn’t the apostles help the beggars though , but they didn’t enable them to continue in poverty, right?)
Dicipling a generation and/or individual people that are not open to confrontation, either they are afraid to confront others about moral issues, or they don’t allow others to confront themselves. The big defense: DON’T JUDGE ME! Where did this reaction start? Where did loving someone into a closer relationship turn into condemnation?
How to love people through differences. I’m a person that loves to disciple people, hates to offend, yet I am a disciple of Jesus, which Jesus naturally offends people. Sometimes I am so passionate about discipling on things like, the importance of living above reproach, all are called to ministry (we all have gifts for the kingdom), the blessing of living and walking in moral authority, that all I want to do is either ring people’s necks who blatantly live lives contrary to this, or I just get depressed and grieve over the state of people I love.
A regular, near daily, prayer-life. A prayer life that focuses on God, and his relationship to me and others, not just a selfish, me-centered prayer life, but one that is about moving forward and listening (such as listening about these four areas).
Added 10:05 – The conflict of our needs, and other’s resources. This is a completely jealous conflict ion, but one none the less that I struggle with. Alexis and I pour a lot of our resources into our calling, our time, our money, and our relationships, it’s all about our calling for discipleship. All around us though we see people spending their time and money on their own desires, cars, houses, that in our opinion (and judgmentally) are well beyond what they need. Why does a single 24 year old need a new Mercedes? Why does a single 25 year old spend over $600 a month in entertainment? Just some thoughts.

So those are the four, now five big things in my life that I feel stuck on right now. I don’t expect to just “get it” one day, I expect though to process through these things, some of them probably for the rest of my life (2 and 3). But I do expect for me to take responsibility in these areas, to do the hard things and ask, to address people on things when I feel conflict yet all in Grace and with the basis that no matter the outcome my care for them won’t change – that my friends is how Jesus lived.

Updated 10:00 am. – Each of these things I think is related to surrender, we/I need to surrender and allow God and his church to do it’s work, unhindered. We have to live as examples, so if we do something that isn’t above reproach – that is against the path that Jesus has called us to live – we must surrender it. It’s not easy, it’s a self-less act that says I will follow my Lord, even though my desire is something different. Sometimes even our God-given desires are not the right path, for the time. I know this, I’ve lived it, I’m living it right now. So instead of crying about it, I’m living my life on the path, and it’s full of blessings! A CHILD! A BABY GIRL. That wouldn’t be such a blessing if I/we had gone on our own whim on our own path.

So it takes money… and some honey.

I have been struggling with the idea of fundraising for a long time now. One part of me would like to do some tent making after we move to Poland, or find some way of supporting our selves, the other part really does not want to take time away from ministry.

So I struggle with asking for funds because I am an independent person, I struggle with not asking because my heart wants to be available for full-time ministry. The truth is that we must find a balance between being funded from outside and doing tent-making. Full-time missions and ministry will certainly become much harder in the years ahead, and I’m sure that if we are anywhere near the end-times it won’t even be possible.

I’m glad that I have skills that can be used all around the world, who knows, maybe my company will expand to Europe, maybe it won’t, but maybe I can become the remote admin or something. There’s a lot of things I could do.

Thinking back though I should also hold onto a promise we heard God tell us a few years ago, that we would be sent, with full financial and authoritative support from our church body. Right now though, that’s just a glimmer, we haven’t started any formal process, except leading small teams on short trips. What does full financial support look like? I guess that is the real question. Is it a job? Is it committed donors?

We don’t want to be independent, we want to be inter-dependent on God and his body, and the gifts he’s given us. So the honey? It’s the sweet reasurance of God’s provision and hand in the unknown. With the knowledge and faith of all that he has given and continues to provide.

Trip update and newsletter!

Czesc! Kazdy! (chesch kashzdy, y makes an i sound as in it)
Hi! Everyone!

Yep, I know, most of you are tired of reading letters, updates, etc… I know I have a hard time reading them as well. So here’s the scoop. Please read the letter, it’s much more interesting and has information on our FUTURE beyond the short trips, but if you truly don’t have the time AND you already know our hearts, and you just want the basic information then read below and skip the letter.

When: February 16-24
Who: Travis and a friend from Arizona (as Alexis is pregnant, and baby Emma is due on March 30th!)
What: A leaders retreat, to train and equip Polish leaders in doing ministry in their own country
Where: Poland, where else? 😛
Cost: Plane tickets are purchased, we still need about $2,000 Asking for only $30 from 80 more people.

Serving our Lord with your parnership,With love,
Travis & Alexis Mielonen

Enemy-occupied territory

Another year

Well it’s New Year’s eve here, it’s a little after 5:00pm Pacific Stand Time right now. 2007 was full of all kinds of events and news that changes the course of many people’s lives. Alexis and I concieved Emma who will be born in just over three months, we’ve been to France, Poland, and Germany, yet again with another trip to Poland not to far away, we got an additional car… I say all of this because they are all things which took faith in our finances…

None of these events were overly planned, we didn’t put away for any of these specifically, nor did we consult our investors, we made a conscience desicision to give some things to God that we knew were either practical needs or ministry desires, and in Emma’s case, a heart desire. On paper and ledgers, we didn’t have the resources to make any of it happen.

We have and will always put our faith in God to provide for us, he always has, and always will. Sure it gets scary, sure we’ve used our “own” resources at times when we thought others would donate, but in the end it’s always Him who gets the glory. It’s all about Him.

While I would love the comfort of knowing that our financial resources were something that we didn’t have to monitor, I know at the same time we would be so distracted by our own desires that leaving for our calling would be much more hard, if even possible to fufill.

Happy New Year, may you build your faith in Him and expierence the joy of serving in His kingdom this year – even when your resources are low, or negative (such as ours have been many times).