No Small Talk – Page 5 – food for fish

On to the dream!

Nine years ago not only did I find my wife, I was also walking into an adventure of a lifetime I never dreamed of being part of… living in Poland. It was nine years ago that I was fundraising to live in Poland for a year, never in a thousand years did I imagine nine years later we would be support raising again, only this time it’s for an entire family and for an indefinite period. Time will change any person, and there’s nothing we can do to stop it. Some friends of ours recently were just launched into their own adventure, except for them it’s to another “P” country, the Philippines, but they had no idea even nine months before!

We have a long ways to go before we are launched, having to raise all of our support (unless by a miracle I end up with the ability to work remotely) adds a lot onto the preparation time. During this time we have to attempt to self-teach ourselves Polish, including teaching Emma, as well as live our “normal” lives here, work, school, church… At times it is a huge burden and I either want to have a “magic” wand waved to get wake up in Kraków, or just run away from the idea and finally “start” our lives. For so long it has seemed we are in limbo, but as we look back and see each of the turns, valleys, and mountains we have climbed, we see God’s fingerprints all over the “evidence” and know He’s getting us there – one way, or another.

2010 was a valley year, 2011 was a mountain climbing year, and 2012, not sure yet – and we need to be OK with that. So for those that read this, continue to keep us in your prayers, we see the field, and we know the workers are few, our hearts are steadfast but our body and mind’s weary.

Tweets for the past week

Decision: To challenge or not challenge myself with something completely outside my box…. #
Challenge accepted… it's been over 10 years since I've done what I'm about to embark on… #
And in other news .. I've confirmed the back car of the MAX is the craziest mix of humanity… #
Emma and Chloe… the cats are back… – http://t.co/TyVQGJcV #
Wow… Snow, on the ground,really? I think the calendar isn't working. #

Freeways, destroyed our society…

I have began learning a lot about the American transportation infrastructure over the last year, and I have to say, I’m not such a fan of the automobile as I use to be. The cost to Americans just to move around from point A to point B is staggering, unhealthy (both physically and economically), and destroys the fabric of our society yes, probably more so than gays and lesbians, abortion, and bad TV. I honestly believe this, and the following is why. This post is in no way conclusive, all encompassing, nor the “end all’ – it’s just part of an adventure I’m on in seeing our world differently, it’s not designed to be political, it’s hopefully a nod to a different way of life which we have found more simple, less taxing on the overall system (in many ways) and provides us opportunity to interact with more people.

The cost is horribly high for what we “get” – most freeways spend a lot of time underutilized, they are built to attempt to work at “peak” load, making them monstrosities which eat up valuable land, create moats around communities, and in reality with every lane addition and expansion more cars hit the roads. You can see examples of this on a recent article I read here. Additionally, by making access to the hinterlands cheaper, more people moved away from the cores of our cities, creating a dependency on cars to get us around, leaving us less healthy, disconnected from community, and paying for car insurance, fuel, and fuel taxes. Some people may even begin to think of our funding system as almost socialist, since everyone is forced to pay for it in some way or another… people would scream if there was a “highway” fare (aka tolling) – like on Transit systems. The cost to build and maintain these “freeways” is very high, and becoming more expensive each year, many times construction lobbyists push for highway construction as a “jobs creator” – and we pay for it, through over budget projects, which are then passed down through state taxing systems making everyone pay, many times at the cost of other more-human scale programs and projects.

Why do I say freeways destroy the fabric of our society? Well, because it has caused many Americans to live in suburbs, and other places where getting around by car is necessary because everything is spread out. This spreading out effect took away the idea of neighbors, sure we have “neighbors” but because our houses needed to be large enough to have garages we started parking in them and never seeing our neighbors, and the land was cheap so we planted acres of lawn and built fences as well. We isolated, disconnected, and bought big TVs for our big houses, and stayed inside. We now have to drive to get even the smallest item, our children (in most cases) can’t even go bubble gum without needing a car ride, and many times it’s not even safe to walk to school because of lack of sidewalks.

Visit anywhere in “old downtown America” such as New York, Boston, Chicago, even parts of Seattle and you’ll find community, culture, and human scale life. Sure I understand big cities are not everyone’s favorite, I have nothing against small town America, my issue is with suburb America, it’s artificial, stale, and forced. Are there drawbacks to living in a large city, in high-rise apartments, yes – of course. But a well planned city, with parks, green space, and transportation for all, is a place where many different people of all backgrounds can come together and live; suburban America has a hard time allowing all kinds of people to live there because, well, you need to own a car – and not everyone can or will.

How living a low-car or car-less lifestyle can be amazing:

Low transportation costs, more money for family/friends and enjoying our communities
Interaction with a greater variety of people, walking, talking, sharing transit, etc. Which leads to greater understanding of the world around us (through interaction that we’ll never have with a car-dependent lifestyle).
A society which connects and interacts, is a society that can take care of each other.
And much more (sustainability, livability, etc).

One last though, for my fellow Christians, we are called to be people who can effect our communities and neighbors, living in places where we don’t need to drive allows us so many amazing interactions with people. Might we begin thinking of living in such places? Many times we are focused on “safe” neighborhoods, which is fine in itself to have some selectivity, but we serve a God who we know will protect us, use the brain He gave us, and trust the savior as well to protect us – and make your living location decision based on the people’s needs, and maybe even think about throwing yourself among the community, go car-less or low-car-use for a while and you might make a few friends along the way!

Alexis and I made the decision to live in a “mid-rise” apartment building in Gresham (Gresham’s only and highest) about a year and a half ago, we absolutely love it. It’s right next to a TriMet MAX station (Civic Drive) and I can walk from our top floor (fifth) unit on the far side of our building, to the platform when there’s less than four minutes to the next train. We currently have one car, since outside of our direct neighborhood, which is wonderful but has no grocery store, we need the car to get around Gresham (there’s decent transit but only on a few core streets and definitely not to where our friends live). We know that our next move will be closer to a downtown core, definitely have a grocery store within walking distance, and be someplace where anyone can get to us easily by transit.

Image of Christ and the Church in today’s culture?

So a while back I started seeing some interesting ads around, the “I’m a Mormon” ads, you know the ones featuring “normal everyday” people, NFL stars, doctors, lawyers, etc. This made me think… what on earth would a “I’m a Christian” ad even begin to look like? I wont’ even try. But then I read an article on one of my favorite online magazines, Out of Ur, called Mormons, Mormons Everywhere and I started to think, does it matter what the world thinks?

It’s a hard subject to approach, but one that I think we (the Church) fail at quite miserably. There’s are part of me that simply thought “just let them think what they want” – but I don’t think that truly reflects the attitude or value we want. We should care what “they” think, but we don’t want to just come up with marketing schemes to make it happen. In the end it’s true transformation of our lives, our friends, and the community around us that will be our “ad” to the world.

But I still think, maybe the Mormon ads do at least (for those of us who at least try to be open minded) get people to rethink their preconceived ideas of Mormons. As I said, I have no idea how the Church in its current state would ever come together to agree on an image to encourage America (and the world) to rethink their ideas… But maybe the Mormons have something going on?

Share your car, share your faith

Sharing your car with complete strangers?

In our car-loving, freeway, go fast obsessed American culture, the idea of sharing our personal cars with others (like a version of Zipcar) sounds crazy to many. I guess the idea of sharing our cars with complete strangers is a bit of a stretch, not to mention possibly not having immediate access to your car (oh my gosh!). But think about it, how many hours out of a day does your car just sit there? With certain protections in place (such as technology to track the cars, and insurance, which in most states would require revising the law), a paradigm shift for some people, and a common goal of utilizing our resources more efficiently – private car sharing can allow those that only need a car from time to time to get around less expensively, at odd hours when transit doesn’t operate, and bring in a little extra cash for car owners.

This concept is something that I think, for those that are willing (for those that can let go, and let God), would make a great ministry for the Church. What a great way to share, show people that our “stuff” really isn’t ours, and share and give a little – not to forget make some money on the side – out of that money pit. Nuts? Maybe! Do our cars really belong to us though? For those whose car sit for 8+ hours a day though, might be worth it!

Talk about Acts 2:42-47 [NIRV]:

42 The believers studied what the apostles taught. They shared life together. They broke bread and ate together. And they prayed. 43 Everyone felt that God was near. The apostles did many wonders and miraculous signs. 44 All the believers were together. They shared everything they had. 45 They sold what they owned. They gave each other everything they needed.46 Every day they met together in the temple courtyard. In their homes they broke bread and ate together. Their hearts were glad and honest and true. 47 They praised God. They were respected by all the people. Every day the Lord added to their group those who were being saved.

Being conscience about food on TV

Food, a basic need, yet for most Christian Americans, it’s around us in far too much abundance, both in the way we consume and the way we throw out. Thanks to Google Reader I came upon this article on The Ooze, one of my favorite online magazines/blogs, an open letter to Food Network and the Travel Channel, and I have to say – I’m in agreement. When I paused to think about what the letter was about, I was convicted by the facts – not only is “food competition” and other extreme uses of food an insult to many parts of the world, it can’t help promote healthy ideas about food, nor the reality that food is in extremely short supply for many people.

While it may not be “our fault” that these food shortages exist, while it is a complicated and often hard to imagine circumstance, maybe we could use our resources in a more creative manner, humble ourselves and use our profits to educate and create sustainable ways of making a difference in other people’s lives. Maybe the Food Network and others like them could have these competitions and the prize is winning trips and documenting these places where Food (and other resources) are not as abundant and teaching others how to change those circumstances, maybe one family or village at a time? Just a quick thought…

The ever changing me

I wish I could say I have “found myself” being that I turn 30 in five days, however, it would not be a true statement. What I can say is that many things have found me and I’ve either accepted those things as “part” of me, or unconsciously integrated them into my person. I’ve done many “this is who I am” or “what makes me” posts in the past (i.e. The Boy Poem, A post about me, and another) and yet I find myself cringing when I read them, because, I’ve changed… and that’s OK. Today I’m much more aware of the social status of the world – and the insane and crazy differences from place to place, and sometimes within the same place. These extremes have forced me to examine what I do and why, and in response I’ve changed.

I’ve never been angry or upset by what some would call “the reason our country/world is falling apart” such as government, sexuality, illegal immigration, drugs, etc. Sure I’ve had my moments of being concerned, and following the crowd (mistake number one) and “doing my part” (i.e. voting for the “right” candidates). Yet, you might say I’ve become disenfranchised by those methods, they are too disconnected and non-relational, and haven’t produced much change, instead all it has amounted to is a veil of security that is not really there.

I use to find myself on the “conservative” side of things, in some of the most traditional ways… but really as I have explored and experienced things around the world I have found that American Conservatism is mostly about “keeping things the way they are” – and American Liberalism is about “making everything equal” – both of which are extremes that just are not realistic. Although I probably more closely align myself with liberals on social issues (except abortion) and conservatives on financial/economic issues (except for funding of basic health care, education, and transportation for all), I really don’t like to put myself in either camp, because there’s an automatic exclusion or inclusion of many things which are far more important and complex than “this or them” arguments.

So, today I would probably think of myself as a socially aware, promoter of sustainable ideas, a social technologist, avoider of black and white ideas, peace bringer, lover of people not ideas, and most of all, husband, father and all of this comes of following and worshiping Jesus.

Tweets for the past week

Oh Budget, I love our bi-monthly meetings even more when I ignore you exist & get to be creative about the things I didn't tell you about! #
Working remotely, from my mother-in-laws, great to be with family, but no automatic coffee machine like the office 🙁 #
There are still good people in this world! Lost my wallet at @northgatemall on Monday, finally traced my steps back and it was turned in! #

What heck is sin?

A while back I ran across an article on OregonLive.com regarding some protesters who were demonstrating against Mars Hill Church’s latest Church plant in southeast Portland. These kinds of demonstrations (from both sides of the fence, read: Westboro Baptist Church and similar groups) seem to only further the divide, certainly these demonstrations don’t encourage a sensible discussion for each side to understand and see the other’s viewpoint (not necessarily agree, but at least get the full picture) and allow for real relationship. It seems most of the time we see “Christians” doing this kind of activity, but it goes to show that every group out there has their extremists.

The world has a hard time understanding how we can call something “sin”, such as homosexuality, because of the long list of connotations “sin” has as a word; and it has become nearly impossible to use the word and not provoke some kind of negative reaction. My definition of sin is simply this: The act of not obeying the Lord either in character as He has asked us through Biblical means, or by direct personal request. It’s also important to note that the Lord sees all sin exactly the same, each one is only one step away, and all He wants is for us to be right near Him – not one step away.

This is why it’s possible for me to see something as “sin” and not have it affect the love, basic human respect, and desire to enter into meaningful friendship with anyone who is willing. We (members of the Church) have to understand and accept the fact that people “outside” can’t possibly understand, and this is why the Good News/Gospel needs to be delivered (evangelism: to deliver the Good News), only the Lord can convict someone of their sin and cause true repentance (change). Our “job” is to live, breathe, speak the Good News as best we can; including recognizing and admitting when we turn away (sin) from God, so we can adjust and move closer to God again, not only as a witness for others, but out of a true relationship with God – as we would for our significant others and friends.

Probably the most important piece to understand is that the process of conviction, forgiveness, and restoration is not dependent on the people in Church telling those outside they are “sinners” – it’s dependent on each individual to accept what they hear from the Lord and be convicted of their position with God (being purposely away by their own choices), ask for forgiveness, and then seeking restoration with Him.

Where we people in the Church tend to mess things up, and it’s a horrible mistake, is taking what’s OK in the Church (holding our brothers and sisters accountable – in a graceful/concerning way, which is another blog post) and applying it to everyone outside of the Church as well. Nearly every scripture about confronting another person is about brother/sister to brother/sister (meaning another member of the Church) not much is said about confronting people outside the Church, except spreading and proclaiming the Good News (the news of Jesus as our Lord, and free grace to all, change your ways and live a full, never-ending life).

There’s a whole lot more I could attempt to write, but this entry would end up being 20+ pages in size 10 text… let’s just say insert a lot of stuff about Love, changing our ways (repentance), and the reality of human nature (sin), and the big picture that gets painted is that God is far more than the box we put Him in.

I spike… easily.

I started writing this post back in November, ’11 – yeah I’m that far behind… if there really is a way to “fall behind” with blog posts… At one point I had 57 “draft” entries. 2011 was a year which might be summed up as simply “thick”, no matter where I turned something was changing, just changed, or proposing a change and with it I had my own things to deal with and balance with a family in tow. It seemed hardships of all kinds were around me and us, although we didn’t have any direct hits this year, we’ve been licking our wounds for a while and have some relational business to continue working on, otherwise though, circumstantially we’re good.

However, through all of this I would have fairly dramatic spouts of frustration and anger, usually over environmental things, like cleanliness, organization, scheduling, etc. and boy did I show my wife how I can spike off the charts when I’m running on empty. Thank God we have some tools in our tool belt to handle it, and for me to cool down in a much more healthy way than years past. Still though I would often find myself stuck, unable to push past…

But it was just that, “pushing past” which was causing me to get stuck, rather than stepping back and analyzing the cause, I just wanted to get “to the other side” and move on… yeah, I know, it doesn’t work real well… but in the moment it’s hard to think like that. On one particular enlightening evening, as we were talking with our pastors Alexis had to bring something up from weeks before which I thought we “pushed past” – well I had, she hadn’t and I hadn’t let her safely express that.

The ability to stop, step back, and recognize what’s going on, who/what the real issue is (remember, our fight is not against flesh and blood) and see from another perspective is a huge asset, nonetheless I still find it hard to enter in to that mindset at the right time. Thankfully Alexis is a wonderfully patient bride, who cares deeply about our marriage and me. So I write this entry months and months after the fact, realizing my silly spikes are not really all that silly, just an indicator of something beyond me.

This is why a life filled with grace and mercy is so important, as God pours His love on us in so many ways, we are able to learn, and be an even greater light to our spouses, families, and friends. However, most of important of all, we find God in us, working through us, and can do nothing else but reciprocate Him to those around us.