God – Page 7 – No Small Talk

Living a life of discipline.

Being disciplined is so hard. A few weeks ago Alexis and I wrote out our priorities, we took what God has called us to in this season and wrote out how we would process those things into a tangible real-life schedule. We put in our devotion times, our exercise times, our solitude times, fellowship time, etc… It has been about three weeks of “implementation”, we certainly need to tweak it, well specifically my schedule, I find my after work exercise and devotion times to always be the things that get knocked out or diminished. However, even with that I have found that my stress levels are much less, which has lead me to being stronger against temptation, not just sexually but also in anger and frustration as well. So as long as I can get a hold on my schedule and be able to say no and yes when appropriate so that these priorities happen, I know I’ll at least be more aware of stress. Even though we have pretty predictable schedules from week to week I’m seeing a need to sit down at least once every week and a half or so and go over the coming weeks so that we are on the same page.

Lord, thank you for putting these disciplines into our lives, your grace alongside discipline has proven to be a blessing that I know will continue into the rest of our lives. I praise you for your work and your love. In Jesus’ name – amen.

It’s been nine months!

I’ve been married for nine months now! It’s absolutely awesome, and I can truly say that I can’t ever go back. Although I am quite independent, and it drives me mad that I must communicate “my” entire life to someone else now… It’s also so very comforting that someone cares for in a way that all other humans will never be able to. It’s been a very bumpy road, God has been going over-time in drilling me to be a husband and head of a household, and many times I felt like a five-year-old throwing a temper tantrum, however, it is all worth it. I’ve been embarrassed, I’ve been very pissed off, I’ve been so selfish that if God were actually “strike ’em dead” kind of God many see him as, I would be dead.

I know there are many more bumps in the road, but they are all amazing bumps… just a hint of what it is to love as Christ loves the church.

And PS. No babies… yet. 😛

It’s about me.

I’ve been trying to figure out what this blog is really about. What direction I want to take it. Well, I’ve decided to take it the same direction as when I started. It’s about me. It’s about me and my walk with Jesus. It’s about me and my relationships. It’s about me. Why me? Because when I focus on the inner thoughts, my outer expressions are closer to Godly expressions. When I take the time to think, process, ponder on my stuff, I find that I can give more to others. It’s about loving others AS I LOVE MYSELF… I’ve been bad at this, and I need to start paying attention. So… I’m going to write a lot about myself, in fact those are the blogs I find the most interesting… the open, sickly honest ones about people’s inner thoughts. That’s what this life is about… learning from each other’s interactions with others, themselves, and most of all with their Creator.

Pillars of my faith

Jesus brings truth, and that truth sets me free
God the father is full of grace, that grace sets me free
The Holy Spirit guides me in authority and power, that authority and power sets me free
Who I am is not based on any one’s opinions, ideas, culture, etc – Who I am is what The Lord has made me
I am broken, but He is healing me, from glory to glory and one day I will see Him face to face in all of His glory and I’ll be in all of mine as well.
I worship the Lord my God will all my heart, soul, mind, and strength and His joy fills my heart
Sometimes there is not a “heeby jeeby” moment, sometimes there is, but at any time I hear his voice, feel his presence, or know that His Spirit has spoken, I obey, sometimes kicking and screaming, and at times ignoring, but when I obey I never regret and always am more amazed by his mercy and grace.

Pure Desire

I don’t have the words to describe how amazing the men’s group that I go to on Saturday mornings is. It isn’t just a “guy’s talking about their problems” group, it’s a truly loving group, completely sincere in purely desiring God. Because of this group I have tools that have made me so much more aware of why I do the things I don’t want to do and why I don’t do what I do want to do. I have so much more of a life because of what God has done for me, using these men, using relationships that a mere 5 years ago I would have thought to be impossible. While I still struggle in doing things I do not want to do, I at least know that my desire to be pure and set apart is where God wants me to be. I’m beginning to get a slight glimpse of where God wants to direct me, in the mean time before Poland.

Reflect on Him.

Reflect a little, give Him your ear.

I just might change the outlook of the rest of this hour, the day, the week, the month, the year, the rest of your life. I have never once been disappointed when I actually listen and reflect on what I hear/feel God saying.

We will go to Poland.

Just in case anyone forgets, we are moving to Poland, depending on God’s timing anywhere from 4-5 years (or whatever He makes it). For some reason I have this thing inside, something that makes me think people don’t care about our vision for Poland. I guess it’s all of the “oh that’s cool” reactions, with hardly (I’m counting 4 so far) anyone showing any more interest than they would a little child who wants to be an astronaut, and actually I feel like that child would get more attention. I’m stopping here, one because we’re at a friends house, and two because I want to sound upset, well, because I am, and I do not want to cover it up with what I know is the truth. I know what the truth is, and I also know how I feel. All we want is to have some people show some strong interest in the vision. Remember I know the truth, I know that this lack of interest does not change our calling.

Father, hear our cry for this nation, raise up people to come along side with support and to support. Thank you for those that are showing more than a casual interest. We know it is your will, praise you Lord for who you are and all that you are doing now. In Jesus’ name I pray for a passion of your name in Poland and for Poland. Amen.

Going so quickly!

Ugh… with everything I’m trying to do to stay sane, it seems it’s making life go by even faster, but that’s better than going by slowly, and depressingly… God has been pretty amazing, nothing really super-duper amazing, but steadily moving forward. Forward motion, one step at a time. I like this pace, it’s so fast that I don’t know what’s going on, and it’s not so slow that I get freaked out. It’s good.

Of course I’ll need to do some fine tuning, but I’ll let it marinate at this pace for a little while longer. Actually allow some good habits to form and be habits, then I’ll try some fine tuning.

Life Lessons

Today while reading the scripture for my daily deovotional I came across something interesting, the passage was Exodus 27, the making of the tabernacle. The interesting part was in all the minute details that God asked be put into the tabernacle and the ark of the covenant. I have heard from all kinds of people, believers, and pre-believers alike that God doesn’t care about the glamar, the vanity, etc. Nope he doesn’t, but he does care about small details, the little things that enhance life, make it nicer. I think that just as he asked the Isralites to craft such details for the tabernacle, God also asks us to be excellent in all we do, crafting our lives to shine. It’s all woven together.

Later on I read Acts 6, and came across the piece about Stephen, one of the seven the Apostles chose to help serve the widows food. Two different times within a paragraph of each other, Acts points out that Stephen was a man full of God’s grace, God’s power, full of the Spirit and man full of faith. We should assume that the others were also full of the Spirit, as that was one of the requirments to be in this serving position. Yet, why point out Stephen… maybe because the author (Luke) was introducing the reader because Stephen would be persecuted in the paragraphs to follow, or is there something more here? What I heard God tell me is that his character, his attention to detail and integrity is what made him Shine, and in turn caused people to see Christ, and Christ was able to work through him….

Desire.

Ever desired something so badly, so deeply, yet you knew it was the wrong thing? Ever desired something so badly, so deeply, yet you were afraid of it, even though it was right? Ever desired something so badly, so deeply, yet you were apathetic to go after it? Ever feel like your desires make you insane? Ever do what you either hate to do or don’t want to do, and you don’t do the things you really desire to do? What shall we do as human beings? Stop doing. We are not human doings, we are human beings. So, stop doing, and start being.

I desire to have an amazing, wonderful, sex life with my wife. Why? Because that intimacy is something that I can only say is a touch of heaven’s love. I desire to be myself, and be comfortable being quirky. I desire to stop doing things for myself, and start being myself for others. I desire to walk by the power of the Holy Spirit, and stop walking by the fears of the enemy. I desire to sacrifice my will for His, not so that I can simply “do” more works, but so I can live simply in His will that I know is good.

I desire simplicity.